TJ Hooker's Amazing World of Arsenal...
Following last weeks almost treasonous (is that a word?) article about the amazing Emirates Stadium, TJH gets back out on the rough streets of Russia for the latest installment...

IV: From Russia with Love.

I have never really been one for international affairs - street crime is my game. I sweep the streets of scum, seek and destroy. I love those that I love and crush the life from my enemies. But what I tell you now goes beyond the street; this is no drug deal gone bad, no stick-up at the 7-11 with a two-bit Saturday night special. This is about affairs of the state and a plan to corrupt all that is good in this world, all that¹s pure and true. What's worse my friends is that this evil would take place at the home of football.

In the late 90's, deep within the halls of the Lubyanka, intelligence officers of the KGB received evidence that Gennady Yanayev made infamous by the failed coup attempt of 1991 was attempting another audacious plot, this time to destabilise Russia from outside her boarders. The plot would require the placement of small number of military officers, loyal to the cause, who would infiltrate the English Premier league by posing as footballers from former soviet block countries.

Once in place they would oversee the recruitment and training of a-list footballers who would act as saboteurs and insurgences who would work to restore the glory of the Soviet Union. And who better suited for this task? With fans hanging on their every word, unprecedented access to the media, world wide attention and fabulous wealth who knows what this red army of godless commie scum could achieve.

The KGB would have to act quickly ­ the first of the saboteurs were due to arrive in less than a year. Thankfully its main contact in London was perfectly placed to see off this insidious threat. Little is know about David Dein¹s connections with MI6 and even less is spoken about them. With connections around the world this formally handsome playboy was well placed to head off the threat. In a secret meeting between the the Arsenal board, MI6 and the KGB's foreign intelligence service, it was decided that a senior KGB officer, who had formally played football with the Ukrainian army would be placed with in the arsenal squad. He would receive special coaching so that he would pass as a professional footballer and be in place in time to see off the threat. Major Oleg Luzhny was dispatched to London immediately.

Though he got on well with the players and enjoyed their support Oleg knew he stood out. Still drawing his service pay, there were no Gucci loafers in his locker, no distressed Versace or Westwood Haute couture; just a denim jacket, George of ASDA sweats and the cold thrill of a service revolver. But at least he had a purpose, a mission, a reason to succeed that went beyond the usual shrill self indulgence of professional pomp. He was a defender alright but his game was salvation; the defence of his motherland, the game, his friends of truth and justice.

Friday's training session would be no different from those that went before it. Running, jumping, weaving between cones; the Frenchman with his stopwatch and the Irishman with his stories about race cars and safari suits. After months of gruelling training Luzhny was still a long way from passing as a professional footballer ­ let alone one good enough to play for Arsenal but he was working hard. As he approached his locker he saw it. He paused for a moment glancing at his surroundings - most of the players were still in the shower, Patrick and Ashley were having an arm wrestling contest as Bob looked on laughing Thierry and Martian were chattering like excited monkeys as Freddie oiled himself in the mirror but there was no one near his locker.

Oleg snatched at the envelop it was blank but sealed with a red blob of wax. This was his call to arms. Hurriedly he tore at the envelope eager to learn of its contents. He stared at the neatly folded sheet of paper inside it contained just two names: Igor Stepanovs and Sergie Rebrov

To be continued readers...

More from TJ Hooker's World of Arsenal next week folks...

ARCHIVES:
Episode I - The Irish Connection...
Episode II - Too Fast, Too Fureeice...
Episode III - Fortress Emirates...
Episode IV Part I - From Russia with Love...
Episode IV Part II - O-Leg to Stand On...
Episode IV Part III - The final stand...
Episode IIIII - Going Dutch...